everyone loses in the blame game

simply stephen / October 11, 2011

Part 1 of 2 in a series on responsibility

part 1 – everyone loses in the blame game

part 2 – 4 warning signs that you are a finger pointer (and what you can do about it)

It really is okay to make a mistake.


It’s something you learn from.

Blaming someone else is all too common. With the blame game nobody wins. The blamee ) is put under fire and the blamer is shirking responsibility.

Do you like it when you are blamed for something you didn’t do?

Probably not.

There’s a lesson here. That blame cascades into feelings of guilt, shame, anger and habit. It festers into something more and ultimately no solution is created for the original obstacle or problem. Yet it seems to come so easily to many. That’s the crux of it…we like to take the easy route instead of following the one that creates more thought and effort.

Effort gets results. It helps us change. It finds solutions. It solves problems.

The point is to solve problems, not point fingers. ~Jane Harman

Let’s use a simple example. Clearly, if you are chronically late, the solution lies within you. It’s not cool to keep blaming the traffic, your alarm clock, the kids or any other event that happened.

Guess what?

It’s time to get up a few minutes earlier and get to work, school or your appointment on time. Stop overbooking. Be realistic and considerate towards the people you are meeting up with. Stop pointing fingers and start to examine the cause to determine a solution.

benefits of taking personal responsibility

If you take responsibility, things get done and that negative effect is removed. That means less anxiety and stress. Surely that sounds good. It also means solution oriented living to create a better life and better world every day.

Constant improvement.

Harry Truman had a sign on his desk that said “The buck stops here”, it’ was his mantra. Instead, he promoted finding solutions to help everyone.

The greater good. Yep. That’s what really counts.

It is amazing what you can accomplish if you do not care who gets the credit. ~Harry Truman

Sometimes we can’t control what happens, but we can control how we react to it!

You decide if you want to act with integrity, grace and dignity. You can also choose the harmful path and continue to point the finger.

Are you a finger pointer? Would you like to change it?

Don’t know where to start. That’s okay, in the next article we will talk about the warning signs and possible solutions.

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